In real life a lizard has been living for months behind the door molding of the linen closet in my mother's guest bathroom. I tried to catch the delightful creature to release him back into the yard where food and water are more available, but he squirmed back into his hiding place leaving me with a piece of his scaly tail between the pads of my fingers and a sense of guilt for having harmed the creature in the process of attempting to help. A couple days ago he scurried into the back bedroom and disappeared under the bed. Again I saw him last night make a dash under the pillows by the curtains and I thought, "I should try to get him again and take him outside or get him some water." He was looking a little brown more than green. But I decided to let him be. This morning I awoke to him dead and turning brown on the floor between the bed and discarded pillows. A surge of regret and sadness came over me as I attempted to put water on his tiny mouth, that had a bit of fluff protruding from it?... It was to no avail. In my search for meaning...literally a google search for "lizard medicine in reverse" brought me to the following website and passages there within...
"If Lizard has turned up in the contrary position, you may be having a nightmare.
This is a sign of inner conflict. Look to the nightmare for a clue to the nature of this
conflict. What are the feelings your nightmare causes? Breathe through these feelings
and let the sensations flow out of your body. See the truth in what your nightmare is
suggesting. It could be the simple message that you are confronting your fears and
therefore do not need to experience nightmarish events in your day-to-day life.
Another message of Lizard reversed is that you may need more sleep or
dreamtime. It could also imply that you have a lack of dreams for your future.
Imagination is the door to all new ideas and creations. As you examine the
dreaming process, you will find that the subconscious is processing all of the recorded
messages it hold concerning the events you experienced during the day. These messages
can be suppressed feelings bringing inner conflict, or they can be new ideas or goals,
other dimensions of awareness, future events, warning signals, or desires and hopes.
In one sense, contrary Lizard is insisting that you look to your imagination for
new experience. This is necessary when life becomes dull or full of boredom. On the
other hand, contrary Lizard may also apply to those who dream too much, refusing to use
the dreams as tools to manifest that same vision in their lives.
All levels of awareness are accessible through dreams. Remember, life is not
always as it seems. Are you the dreamer? Or are you the dreamed?"
and then I read...
"Rekindle lost goals or desires. Expand your vision. Honor messages in your dreams."
And even as I began to write these passages the symbols of the dream become clearer to me. The disenfranchised are being sacrificed to feed the children of the providing paternal figure. If only the children knew by what means their bellies were being filled.
This comes on the heels of having well meaning people tell me to focus on what I can offer the world in a practical business sense. All the time my heart is saying I just want to create, nurture, and care for art babies and real babies. my soul cries because this is being neglected in our modern world in exchange for prioritizing projects that bring in money, rather than projects that create healthy connects and nurture mental, emotional, and physical growth. I don't want to offer things that encourage exploitation...I want to offer things that encourage connection with spirit, self, family, partners, friends, and community. I am a social artist. I am hear to create, expand, and inspire. Not to conform.
So Uncle Sam you can keep your forms, your mandates, and false notes. This soul is a rebelle with a cause! And I really believe in "no child left behind"...the sentiment...not the program using the phrase to act like it is for the benefit of our future generations! Just like the Affordable Care Act is by no means affordable...for the US government or anyone who "opted" into coverage!